Bible Study, Champagne & Showering with Cats

Sorry for not posting anything yesterday. My back went all hinky on me because I was reenacting the role of Wonder Woman around the house. Oh, and I’ll post the winner of the No. 3 Writing Prompt for this Week’s Competition somewhere within this post. 🙂 I’m a stinker. No?

First off, I cleaned like a crazy woman starting Tuesday concentrating on outdoor areas, putting things away, tossing all the garbage that had created its own small mountain and ecosphere. Still… 😐

After I’d prettied-up the outside areas, I turned my attention to the inside of the house–the bigger of the two problems. I have no idea why or how the house can get so gross in just a matter of a few days. Before leaving for Wenatchee (where I taught a workshop this past weekend at the WOTR Writers Conference), I swept the floors, washed out the toilets (ew), tackled the living laundry monster and even, dare I say, dusted! I hate to dust. Gets my fingers grimy and I feel it for weeks. It’s like wearing filthy gloves. I hate dusting. Mom tortured us as children by making us dust our “Mediterranean” furniture. You know. The design with all the curly-cue wrought iron supports, grooved wood and leather tacks? And, she was a white glove tester, Mom was. Gah. I hated that furniture. Wanted to pile it into a Auschwitz-sized bunker and torch it. (Is that politically incorrect? Gosh. I hope not. It’s what I truly wanted to do).

Where was I? Oh yes. Cleaning. Bleh. Okay. So, I’m scurrying for TWO DAYS trying to ready my humble abode for the Bible Study Babes (which I often shorten to The Bible Babes), a group of seven women who meet a few times a month to study, doi, the Bible. I love this group of women. They constantly amaze me with their knowledge of everything Jesus Christ and the Bible. They amazed me again yesterday when they displayed their knowledge of the grapa–a bottle of bubbly that I’d gotten (hoping not to offend) for after our Bible study.

Well! That went bye-bye like water through a fish’s fins! I’ve never seen such motivation. And, so did the bottle of pinot gris I had in the fridge. Needless to say, the Bible Babes had smiles on their faces when they floated out of my doors.

THE WINNER OF THE #3 WRITING PROMPT IS… Linne Pullar with her entry which can be found by clicking HERE! Congrats, Linne! Job well done. You get 5 Stars for your entry!

So, I’m dead beat after the Bible Babes leave and sort of, um, collapse on the couch and stay there for hours until Bob returns home from playing golf. Every Wednesday–Men’s Day–he spends about 5 hours at the course beating up on a poor defenseless little golf ball. I know. I’ve seen it!

Anyway, he’s hungry when he gets home and although my mind told me to “Get off the couch!” My body refused. In fact, it refused to the degree of seizing up on me and locking my left lower lumbar into a sitting position. Dancing was out of the question at that point and also any further cleaning (I’m thrilled to announce).

I shoulda had this!

I climbed the stairs on my hands and knees with Robert, our dog, on my back like a papoose and pulling Pinky up the stairs like a piece of rolling luggage [Please! No hate comments/mail/email about animal abuse–I’ve included this segment as a visual (only) for literary effect. I DID NOT REALLY have my dog on my back or pull my kitty like a pullman!]

We get into the sack and I’m desperate for a bit of snooze-time but my little Pinky thinks nighttime means howl-and-chase-me-time instead. We have diametrically-opposing ideas, here.

HOWEVER! Each night when she starts this cute little gurgly-burbly yowl-thing she has goin’ on, I get up and take a shower. The sound of the water, the heat and moisture seems to calm her and then she lets me go to sleep!

Weird. I know but “Hey! Whatever works.” Then, I thought, well, maybe kitty thinks I’m smelly?

Like, “Hey mommy. Wid you pweez wash de underarms and brush de skank teeth ’cause weez kittays hate da smellies.” Yeah. Like, so, your cat box smells rose petal fresh. Right?

Anyway, I’m super clean this week. My back’s out but at least when the EMTs come to take me to emergency, I’ll be fresh as a daisy.

Here’s another one for you viewing pleasure.

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